What’s My Motivation?

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2 Responses

  1. slats says:

    I’m taking the course also. One of my greatest strengths was kindness. I can say honestly that when I show kindness it blossoms and spreads. It warms my soul like a fleece blanket. The more you show and give kindness, the better you feel. True kindness doesn’t expect any acknowledgement, paybacks or remembrance.

    • Jill says:

      It would be nice to think that “true kindness doesn’t expect acknowledgement” but I don’t think people are altruistic. I believe altruism is a myth because when we do a kindness for someone else we derive pleasure from the act – therefore we gain as well. My fear in choosing the rewirement of actively practicing kindness was that I would become jaded by the lack of awareness and acknowledgement and appreciation of those acts because I was being deliberate in doing them. Ironically, it helped me to see that I actually do these things all the time already. I was, at times, disappointed in people when they took a kindness and showed no recognition that they were on the receiving end of said kindness, but I also came to see that maybe people are slow to recognize a kindness in the moment and need time to think and reflect on it and that perhaps they appreciate it later in those thoughts and reflections. I don’t need to witness the appreciation, I can imagine it, and that works for me as well! I changed the way I perceived it; I reframed the reaction and it made it better for me. I need to at least believe my acts of kindness will have an effect.

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